Just Laurel

Getting to know you

7 Comments

If you have been reading my blog, you’ll know that I recently began a new job at an out-patient surgical center.  At work, I am the new girl.  We are all dressed in scrubs and everyone looks the same.  You can’t tell the nurse from the techs from the anesthesiologist from even the doctor.  (Yes – the other day there was this girl in scrubs leaning on the counter by us nurses – and someone addressed her as Dr. ____ .  Oops!)

As the new girl I try to do my job while I stand back and work on memorizing everyone’s name.  And as I work and stand a little off from everyone (‘cuz I’m the new girl) I find it interesting to listen to the friendly chit-chat that happens between co-workers.  One nurse has a married daughter with two grandsons she adores.  Another nurse has a daughter who rides and shows horses.  One tech is a dad who sometimes leaves work early to pick up his kids from school.  Just by listening, I am finding out that all these blue-scrub-clad medical workers are real people with real lives.  I am getting to know them.  I wonder what they think of me so far?

At the gym where my bff Clara and I go to, we encounter many of the same crowd of people every morning that we work out.  At first they all looked the same to us, but as the weeks went by we got familiar with the ‘regulars.’  (Yeah – stay away from the creeper in the camo pants, and OMG – check out those girls lips! … she was looking real ducky that morning!)  There is this one guy who we always nod a “hello” to and engage in occasional conversations.  One day he said, “By the way my name is Mike.”  We found out that Mike had a daughter and at least one grandson, and that Mike used to ride motorcycles.  We’ve been getting to know Mike.  Just a little.  But enough to realize that we haven’t seen him in about a week.  Hmm.  Now that we know his name and have gotten to know him a little, we are a bit concerned with him being absent.

Today my book, Amanda, Perfectly Made, is ‘live’ – that means it is available for purchase.  People are ordering my book and the Kindle users have ordered and are reading already.

Today, I am terrified.   There’s not going to be any ‘getting to know you.’  My book is about me, as a mom, and the journey over the past 29 years.  I’ve shared my thoughts, fears, anger, faith, successes and fails as a mother to Amanda and her sisters.  I am scared that, as a reader, you might not like me.

I have a friend who read an earlier version of my book for me and commented, “You better be prepared for the backlash and criticism.”

I wasn’t sure what she meant, unless there will be readers who are going to harshly judge me as a mom to a handicapped daughter and the choices and decisions I made.  I don’t know.

There is more to me then being Amanda’ s mom.  I am a wife, and a friend, a neighbor, a daughter, a singer at my church, an actress when given a script, a nurse, a co-worker, and a child of God.  I am doing the best I can.  It is my heartfelt desire that my book will touch the people who need to hear my story.  God tapped me on the shoulder to write it and led me through every tap on my keyboard.

People can be made generic by the clothes they wear – with everyone the same in blue scrubs or workout clothes.  Underneath those clothes is a person with a name.  We all have a story.  We all have people we love and who love us.  We all have talents and responsibilities that make us who we are.

Walk a mile in my shoes and please read Amanda, Perfectly Made.

just Laurel

 

 

 

Unexpected

Leave a Comment

Today was grocery shopping day.  Not my favorite thing to do, but a necessary one.  It’s okay.  With my list in hand, I am a driven woman to seek and conquer – filling my basket with the needed items and making it home asap.  I have been caught off guard the last couple of shopping trips while I am at the register.  At the particular store I frequent, the cashier has been asking, after greeting me, this question:  “Did you find everything?”  Of course, I say, “Yes, thank you.”  And I am sure most people say the same thing.  But one time, I really took the question to heart, thought about it, and answered honestly, “No, I didn’t.”  The poor cashier stopped scanning my items and froze.  She looked at me, dumbfounded.  I chuckled and said to her, “I bet you don’t get that answer very often.  So, now what?  What are you going to do about the item that wasn’t in the store?”  (I was being nice)  The poor thing replied, “Well, I don’t know!  They told us to ask customers that question, but they didn’t tell us what to say if you answered ‘no’ !!”  I laughed and told her that it was okay, I could live without that particular item.  The amusing part was that I caught her totally off guard and my answer was unexpected.  Everyone going through that check out line just says their hello and nods and pays and is on their way.

Every day we all get the same expected response when we ask people, “How are you ?”  And that answer is “Fine.”

“Hi!  How are you?”

“Fine!”

“How ya doin’?”

“Fine.”

“How’s your day going?”

“Fine.”

“Fine” is the expected answer.  If people answered honestly and told about how their dog died, or about their migraine, or the fight they had with their spouse, it would put a pause in you day as you tried to absorb this totally unexpected response.

My husband Ted is the king of the unexpected.  When people ask him how he is, the answer is not any benign “Fine,” it is:

“Hey Ted!  How are you?”

He answers, “Unbelievable!”

(I know – most of you reading this already knew)

But he answers with the unexpected.  He really has fun with it.  It makes some people laugh.  Others remain completely puzzled.  But for many, it breaks the monotony, gives their brain a little burst of thinking juice, and makes the conversation a little less robotic and more human.

I like the saying:  Expect the unexpected.  The online “Wiktionary” defines it as this:  To not be surprised by an unusal event. Anything could happen, and probably will.

I’m all for giving a different answer and stepping away from the usual!  Let’s have fun, people, and be unbelievable!  Step outside of the paradigm box of “fine” and be unexpected!

I was caught by the unexpected:

My daughter, Jillian, was chatting with me on Facebook when she copy and pasted a website for me to click on.  I expected it to be the next thing she had her eye on to buy (sorry Jilly !).  So I clicked and it was an Amazon.com listing for the book “Amanda, Perfectly Made” by Laurel Rausch Greshel.

Ahhhhhhhhhhh!  omg omg omg  That was totally UNEXPECTED!   I mean – I should have expected it because publish date is nearing.  But (yeah, I have to say it) it was totally unbelievable to see.

Have an unbelievable Monday everyone – and expect the unexpected!

just Laurel

 

 

Just in time…

2 Comments

Two weeks and counting down for Amanda to be moved to her apartment.  Things aren’t exactly ready.  The current challenge is getting staffing lined up for her.  Through her community support agency, she has been approved for seven to nine hours of staffing each day.  (We’re still waiting for the official word on that.)  We have an agency that is supposed to be working on lining up her staff people.  I guess that’s why I am dragging my heels still.  She’s not moving unless we have the staff lined up to help her, otherwise I will be her staff and I’m doing that at home here already.  Doesn’t make sense to move her and have me there every day to tend to things.  That’s what we’re trying to get away from.

I am an organizer.  I am trying to organize this move.  I want everything packed, purchased, scheduled, and ready to fall perfectly into place on the designated moving day.  Doing things last-minute is not my style.

My husband Ted, however, is comfortable doing things all in good time.  He doesn’t plan out (or worry) when things need to be done.  He just does them. 

For example …

Remember those oak trees previously mentioned in another blog?  They tend to drop tree ‘stuff’ in the spring onto the roof as well as acorns in the fall, along with the falling leaves.  That stuff clogs the gutters.  When it rains the gutters overflow.  It’s a mess. 

Ted is so good about cleaning the gutters out.  There have been numerous stormy nights when we begin to hear the pouring rain on our roof and Ted leaps up to clean the gutters.  Oh yes, he puts on a rain jacket (well sometimes) and goes out to the garage, pulls out the big ladder, and gets on the roof in the pouring rain (with the thunder and lightning crashing around him) and he gets those gutters clean!  I simply pray for his safety while he’s out there and wait for the sound of a loud “thud” before I check on him and get the phone ready to dial 9-1-1.

My neighbor knows how good Ted is about keeping the gutters clean.  With her husband working a midnight shift, she depends on her dogs to help her feel safe at night.   Late one stormy evening, the dogs started barking at a lurking shadow they sensed in the far side yard.  My poor neighbor nervously peeked through the window blinds, noticed the outline of a man propping a ladder against our garage and then quickly relaxed as she told me later, “Oh – I realized it was only Ted, out to clean his gutters!”

I wish I could sometimes be more like Ted and not fret about things.  He always gets things done in time and without the days and weeks of preparatory planning.  Besides, if I truly trust God with Amanda’s move, then I must simply be patient while everything works itself out.  >gulp<

Ted cleaned out the gutters today.  It’s not raining.  Hmm.  Odd.

The gutters and even the front downspout were full of acorns.  I wonder if he’s feeling anxious too?

Luke 12:25  25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? 26 Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

I will try not to worry.  I will try to be patient.  I will try to have faith that it will all work out. 

But if it’s storming out, I’m NOT getting up on the roof.

just Laurel

By the way …

Had a little photo session today with a wonderful girl, Julienne Floetke, who took pictures of me for the back cover of my book.  Here are some favorites:

Rain

Leave a Comment

I don’t like the rain all that much.  I know it is wonderful after a dry spell.  Farmers depend on it;  but they don’t want too much and too little is a problem as well.  I think my dislike comes from several life experiences.  When my daughters were young and a loud nighttime storm brought thunder and lightning, it meant a disturbed night of sleep should one of them wake up.  Another reason to not like the rain was the basement in our old house flooded just about every time we got a downpour.  And before the new roof, a pouring rain often brought the sickening wet sound of ‘drip drip drip’ somewhere in the house as the rain trickled through the ceiling somewhere and made a soggy puddle on the floor.

Even now that I have a dry basement and a secure roof over my head, if it starts to rain in the middle of the night I literally put the pillow over my head and squeeze my eyes shut.  I can’t wait until it’s over.

When it rains it pours.  We’ve all heard that saying.

So what does it mean to us?  When something hasn’t occurred for a while, we find that it suddenly occurs in overwhelming quantity.  For a farmer who has seen no rain and prayed for it to happen, he might find that it will start raining and not stop until the fields flood.  Business might be dreadfully slow but then suddenly turn around and become almost too busy to handle.  When it rains it pours!

This morning I felt like life was pouring around me!  Things have been calm for a while with life on a pretty even keel.  Oh dear – Sorta like the ‘calm before the storm’  huh??  Well, things are getting a little stormy with pulling together all the details of moving Amanda out (drip, drip, flash of lightning), the finishing details happening with my book (thunder rumbling, pitter patter raindrops), and now I found myself a new part-time job to start next week (ka-boom and now the water is rising!).

(deep breath, stay calm)

I am sure that I am not the only person who dislikes the rain.  Think of all the wet songs and sayings written through the years:  Rainy days and Mondays always get me down!   Can’t stop the rain!  Don’t rain on my parade!  He doesn’t know enough to come in out of the rain.  Raindrops keep falling on my head!  It’s raining cats and dogs!  You are right as rain.  Hey – I better take a rain check on that.

So other people have survived the rain – and so can I, right?  I’ll let God be my umbrella and put on my rain boots.  There’s always new growth after the rain (that could be good!) and always a chance of a rainbow!  I love rainbows.

Yes sir, come rain or shine, I will weather this storm.  And I bet I’ll be right as rain when everything turns out just fine and the Son shines !

I still might sleep with the pillow over my head tonight.

just Laurel

Icing on the Cake

2 Comments

I love frosting.  If I’m going to eat cake, I have to have the corner piece or the biggest, fattest, glob of sickening sugary frosting flower available.  Can you believe I’ve actually seen people scrape the frosting off and simply eat the cake p l a i n ?  Puh-lease!  The frosting is the best part.

I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase:  “Well, that’s just icing on the cake!”  It means that whatever good thing you just got or just received or just did – well it just got one step better and that lovely sweet addition to your already wonderful thing just got elevated to delicious awesomeness!  I mean cake is good!  It is tons better with frosting!!  (Unless of course you are one of those scrape-the-icing-off people.  I am sorry for you – you just won’t understand this.)

Now I shall segue to a most logical next topic and that is music.  (you guys are going to learn how my mind works by reading my wandering blogs!)  I sing in a six voice group and one of our recent songs is Revelation.  Now I have to blame my husband Ted on this one.  One of the lines of lyrics in this song is:  “With all creation I sing”.  He told us, after we sang it one particular time, that it sounded like we were singing “With all creation icing”. 

Creation icing! 

I love it!

What is it?  (I pondered)

Creation Icing must be something … something wonderful … created(of course) … created by God … that God took one step farther … and topped with something even sweeter!  I told Ted about my word and created definition and he said, “Oh yeah, like a snow covered mountain”.  Fail.  Okay – it is a creation (mountain) topped with another creation (snow) but I think he was still in cupcake mode and his mountain was chocolate with cream cheese frosting. 

How about bees??  Crops wouldn’t be pollinated without those little buggers.  In the process, they make HONEY!  Now that’s a really sweet ‘icing on the cake’!  Or how about rain?  Naturally we need rain so things can grow, we have water to wash and drink, and most importantly for sailboats.  The beautiful sweet topping is often the rainbow.  Can you think of others?  What great creation can you think of that God took one step farther and really laid in on thick and sweet – making it even one level better?  Post your ideas – I’d love to hear them!

For now, I leave you with 2 updates!

#1  It looks like Amanda’s accent wall in her apartment bedroom will be the lovely purple shade called CLEMANTIS with the other walls painted the lovely shade called RHAPSODY LILAC.

#2  I received my ‘author proof’ of my book today to go over – and it was the first time I saw the cover design.  I was stunned!  We went with an idea Ted had that the publisher”s art team transformed and added the title in an awesome font.  I couldn’t believe I was looking at my book.  My book.  I sat at the table, staring at the computer screen and cried.  And there, along the bottom of the beautiful cover design of my book, I read “Laurel Rausch Greshel”.  Wow.  Now THAT was icing on the cake!

just Laurel

Dirty Laundry

3 Comments

Amanda and I drove over to her apartment today to check on the changes that are being made and to measure walls.  The apartment has been undergoing some rennovations to make it barrier free.  A man who works at the building stopped by to talk to us and answer any questions we had.  There were several small issues regarding things like moving a light switch so Amanda could reach it and a door being in the way of Amanda’s wheelchair manuevering.  But basically, the apartment was in pretty good shape.  Amanda spoke up and said that there was one more thing she wondered about.  I was a little surprised that she had something else to mention, since we had already mentioned everything, so I was a little wary as to what she was going to say.  This man and I both paused and waited for her to speak.  She hesitated for a second and almost thought not to mention it, but then bravely asked, “Could you put in a clothes chute?” 

Now where did that come from?

I laughed and reminded Amanda that we were on the ground floor of an apartment building that did not have a basement.  Where were the dirty clothes going to ‘chute’ to I asked.  She thought for a moment then murmured, “Oh!  Never mind.” 

Amanda is a creature of habit.  Amanda’s bathroom at our house where she changes her clothes has a clothes chute.  I suppose she was just trying to make her apartment as much like her current home as possible, including the routine of dropping the dirty clothes down the chute! 

The scenerio made me ponder more on laundry or clothes chutes.  I don’t believe they are put into many of the new construction homes today.  Too bad.  They are so darned convenient!  Take off the old dirty clothes and make them disappear down the chute!  That made me think of dirty laundry.  Not the kind we feed to our clothes washer but the personal matters we all have that could be embarrassing if made public.  So then that made me think of my book.  (Laurel – did you have too much caffiene today?  Where are you going with this?)  Folks, I really got personal in telling my story of the past 29 years.  There’s some real dirty, honest thoughts in there.  The kind of thoughts that you try to squelch and hide because you don’t really want to be talking about the ‘what-ifs’.  (sigh)

It would be great if all the bad, all the goofs and blunders, all the negative thoughts, the mistakes, the sins, and the “oops’s” we make in life could disappear down the chute.  But sometimes the bad makes clear the path to good.  Maybe my dirty laundry will make you feel more comfortable about yours! 

Bless her heart – Amanda simply wanted her own laundry chute!

just Laurel

Isaiah 43:18  Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past! (Throw that dirty stuff down the laundry chute!)

Psalm 51:2  Wash away all my iniquity  and cleanse me from my sin. (Do the laundry – ask for forgiveness!)