Just shy of 3 weeks to go until we move Amanda to her own apartment.  Because she’d been stuck in the house all day, I had her go with me to Target to “Look at things for you apartment”.  Oh, we saw lots of things.  But I made no purchases.  I kept making excuses about needing to go to the bank first and that I wanted to check with her dad about some things.  I’m dragging my heels.  I’m still scared.

Besides worrying about moving Amanda out I am guilty of carrying the worries about multiple other things.  I don’t always do that but this afternoon I was overcome by a wave of worries.  Lots of changes in the lives of all members of our family right now.  You’ve been there right?

So I told myself I wasn’t going to get super personal about stuff on this blog so I will just graze this subject out off necessity for the purpose of bringing meaning to today’s blog.

I had a colonoscopy this morning – just a check-it-out and it’s the responsible-for-your-health thing to do.  Ted had his a few weeks ago (I made him go first) and today was my turn.  Now I had to mention it because if I go on to tell you about the anesthetic I had this morning everybody would be all over me asking what I was in the hospital for.  >sigh< 

My good friend knew I was having my colonoscopy this morning and she told me, “I know this sounds weird, but I just love it when they put that medicine in your I.V. and you relax and go into such a wonderful sleep”.  Well, I have to agree with her. As the nurse pushed the sleepy juice through my I.V. it felt wonderful to slip away so easily and into undisturbed peace.  No snoring from the other side of the bed, no noises heard to waken me, no aching back or hips, and no restless sleep or strange dreams to disturb my slumber.  All too soon I was wakened by voices and a styrofoam cup of juice in my face and was told to drink.

Darn that didn’t last long.

Now for those of you who have had the good ‘ole colonoscopy – we all know that the prep is the hardest part!

You don’t really want to do it.  You know it’s for the good.  Other people have done it before and gotten through it.  You have to plan your schedule around it.  Sometimes your stomach hurts.  Sometimes you even want to throw up.  It’s just plain UNCOMFORTABLE!

As I was driving home from Target with Amanda, I was listening to my CD of the music that the group I sing with, Celebration, is rehearsing for a concert this Fall.  There is some wonderful new music on it.  I keep it playing on continual loop so I can in-grain it in my brain.  And in my emotional worry-filled mood the song that happened to be playing is a new one called “Blessings”.  I love this song!  These are the lyrics that hit me square in my forehead:

“What if your blessings come through raindrops, what if your healing comes through tears?  What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near?  What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?”

Wow.

So maybe this is my prep time for making the change of having Amanda move out? 

I don’t really want to do it.  I know it’s for the good.  Other people have done it before and gotten through it.  I have to plan my schedule around it.  Sometimes my stomach hurts.  Sometimes I even want to throw up.  It’s just plain UNCOMFORTABLE!

just Laurel